You are Here

It's Five-Minute Friday, where I join a community of writers on a one-word prompt. Five minutes. Just five minutes to write, and in that writing, to incorporate the one word. No editing, no rewriting, no going back. The prompt this week is: here.

You are here
Like at the mall
And I'm looking at the shop directory
The map with the yellow star
Just past the Food Court
Fragrance of Cinnabuns
Like fine perfume
I have to find the restroom

You are here
I watch the blue dot
On my phone
Move along a black thread
Untangled from back roads
Hay bundles litter the fields
Furred checkers
On a titan gameboard
Fresh breath of clean

You are here
The U-haul orange
Almost hits the eaves
Ramp clanks
Dolley-wheels squeak
Garage door rumbles open
Empty house
Soon-to-be filled
Smells like emptiness

You are here
My finger points to the number
Chapter and verse
My daughter's bible
On her lap in church
Next to the journal
Where she copies holy words
Of grace and love
I inhale her innocence and
Exhale prayers for her safety

You are here.
On this journey
In this place
Wrapped in His arms
Peace to you

You are here.

Jesus is Here

I can't seem to let it go, this new thing my daughter is telling me. I sit at my computer in the early-before-morning, cup of coffee on the desk beside me. My husband and I share the desk, he checks the weather and wanders through Craigslist; I catch up on emails and facebook. Sierra is usually the last to come down the stairs.

It used to be that she would wrap warm, sleepy arms around me, then move to our favorite Army guy, then to the dog - old dog in his bed - awake but not up. I've said it before - my daughter is an equal-opportunity hugger. It used to be, that after her 'rounds', she made her way to the kitchen to pour herself a cup of coffee, then move the piano bench over to the desk to share our morning with us.

"I am not awake yet," sleepy sounding words, soft voice.

"I not have my coffee yet", true statement of the obvious.

But this last week has been different. Yes, we still get hugs all the way around. Yes, she still gets that precious cup of coffee.

But this last week, the good-morning statements aren't about being awake. They aren't about coffee.

"Jesus is here, Mommy."

My heart jumps. You have to know my daughter. She's not a halfway kind of girl. If she's unsure, or treading those waters of not-knowing, or not-understanding, she ducks her head, avoids eye contact, changes the subject, gives a little, misplaced giggle, or passes the topic off with a 'just kidding' statement. Not today. Not yesterday, nor the day before. Her voice is strong; her words are clear. Her eyes sparkle with life, like bright sunlight on the river.

"Jesus is here."

It's the first thing she tells me, everyday now for a week.

I've asked her about it, about Him. "Where?" I ask.

"In my room." Her smile widens, like a memory. Words still crystal clear.

"In your room?" Her hand pats my shoulder and rubs my back. She must sense my confusion. I am thinking about Jesus. I am thinking that I know He is with us, in our lives; I believe in a personal Savior. I am thinking about Jesus in my life, in my heart. It is the first time I've ever heard my daughter express this kind of relationship with Jesus.

"Is Jesus in your heart?" I am searching her face, her eyes, her smile. I don't fully know what she understands. I think she may know more about Jesus than I ever will while I'm still here on earth. I think, not the first time, that her spiritual connection surpasses express-ability.

She places her hands on her chest, she knows where her heart is - lots of visits to various cardiologists have given her a good sense of this kind of anatomy.

"Yes, Jesus is here; he is in my heart."

Have you ever seen someone transformed by joy? I witnessed my daughter, her face bright, her eyes wide, her smile wide, her hand on her heart, transformed. Jesus does that to people, doesn't He?

There is a growing ministry in many churches and denominations - some call it Disability Ministry - I would prefer a name like Differing Ability Ministry - but, words...right? I suppose I've had a finger on the pulse of this ministry for several years, ever since we became part of a 'Friends Class' and 'Bridge Service' in Virginia, where adults with cognitive disabilities were invited to worship and take a Sunday School class. I helped teach that class for awhile. The hope behind Disability Ministry is to provide a place for adults and children, like my Sierra, to learn about and access all of the things we all want and need to learn and access within a church community: fellowship, missions, scriptural knowledge and insight, corporate praise and worship...

The idea is spreading and there are successes and not-so-successes. In some ways, it is transforming the way churches 'see', and causing them to review and revise some hidden and not-so-hidden policies. Change. No matter who the population, there will be change.

I read something recently, by a guy deep in the process of facilitating positive change for Disability Ministry. In his blog, Disabled Christianity, he wrote about a verse from Matthew that opened my eyes concerning my daughter.

You have been given the chance to understand the secrets of the kingdom of heaven."

Matthew 13:11 (NIV)

Whenever someone has a ready heart for this, the insights and understandings flow freely.

Matthew 13:12 (Message)

If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.

James 1:5 (NIV)

What an exciting opportunity we have. Ask for wisdom. Jesus is here. Seek the kingdom of heaven. Jesus is here. Make your heart ready. Jesus is here.

Amazing.

Linking with RARaLinkup, Unite, Three Word Wednesday, TellHisStory, SDG Sisterhood

Not Perfect for the Worms

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, 

that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.

John 3:16 (KJV)

Yesterday was, in the words of my daughter, a good day. The full moon reflected light across our neighborhood; it was Oh-dark-thirty when we walked down the driveway, across the road, and climbed into the jeep. Sierra, with her backpack slung over her shoulder, tenderly carried our breakfast - two boxes of sugary-pastry snacks, to eat on the trip to the river. Her pack was ready; ipad, a chapter book, a workbook, and a bag full of colored markers. My husband and I both carried bags - lunch, waterbottles, extra jackets, bait, poles...

By the time we arrived at our special fishing spot, the moon was a distant memory and the sky showed promise of beautiful blue.

I sat on the back of the boat, trying to throw my line into precisely the right patch of sunlight and weeds, the perfect place where I knew my fish was lurking. The breeze molded the water into precious waves, breaking on the shore and whispering through the rushes, like an instrumental accompaniment to the singing of each cast and plunk - musical and fulfilling.

It was a perfect time.

I looked around and stretched my arms out wide to my husband, my daughter, and the lake - an all inclusive hug, and I said it out loud. "This is perfect."

Then I spied the bait container. I'll bet it's not perfect for the worms. I know, I couldn't help myself.

So, here's the thing. We live with perspective, we see the world through a particular point of view. Ours. Some of us, at times, try on a different perspective, a different way of seeing, a different point of view. 

I was sitting in church today, listening to the message about John 3:16. God SO loved the world --- he loved ALL of the world, not just our little corner and our little opinions, ALL of his creation. ALL his creatures, ALL of mankind, ALL of US. He still does. He even loves those who don't love him back, those who don't love anyone else, those who don't love themselves. 

Something to think about...

Linking with Janis, and Charlotte

Try: In Which My Daughter Teaches Me, Yet Again!

It's Five Minute Friday, again, the day when writers 'just write', on a one-word prompt, for five minutes. No time to edit, no time to revise, no time to rethink. Just. Write. So, once again, much as I try, I can't seem to bring it all in under the five-minute mark. But I'm getting closer. This week's prompt, appropriately, is TRY,

We drive home from the clinic with the radio on. At first it is simply background noise because we talk about my daughter's appointment. This appointment was to start the process of a referral for a second opinion for a possible upcoming procedure. Sounds kind of wishy-washy, doesn't it? But the possible procedure is a big deal.

And now I have to digress. From the time she was in grade school, my daughter participated in Special Olympics in some form -- she's competed in cheerleading, and basketball, bowling, and track-and-field. It was during her high school years in track-and-field that we started noticing a more pronounced hitch in her step. A definite limp. Not that we ever really cared about her times, we noticed a distinct slow-down and kick-out. She still told us she was 'fast as a rocket', but it was becoming obvious that her orbit was on a slow decay.

So started the process of finding out what was going on with our joy-in-the-running girl. The first orthopedic doctor had her walk on her toes, then try to walk on her heels, then he measured the lengths of her legs. He told us that this hitch-step we observed was related to the low-muscle tone which was related to her Down syndrome. He told us it would probably get worse as she aged, but that there was really not much to be done. We let her keep running; after all, who can stop a rocket?

We saw him a second time, the following year; the hitch-step was worse; she was throwing her leg to the side as she labored down the track. Smile as wide as the stadium, dead last every time. My husband didn't accept his opinion this time, and we asked our insurance company to send us to someone else. Much has been said about military insurance - our experience has been very good. Within a month, we were seeing another orthopedic specialist.

This one took an x-ray. And showed us that Sierra's hip was not completely in its socket, showed us that her socket wasn't quite as round and deep as it should be, showed us that there was much more going on with our daughter than mere low-muscle tone. Then came an explanation of a possible surgery that could correct the joint. In involves breaking the bone around the socket and pinning it back in a new position - a deeper, rounder position that will better cradle the head of the femur. It possibly involved breaking the ball off of the head of the femur and repositioning it so it would better nestle into the newly-formed socket. This doctor suggested the procedure might need to be done in the future; it was not imminent because my daughter was not experiencing any pain. He also let us know that complete hip replacement was also an option -- but that we would want to hold off for a time -- the life span of hip replacement is around 10 years and Sierra was only 20 at this point.

My brain whirled. I memorized the name of the complicated surgery - periacetabular osteotomy, with a possible femoral osteotomy. And I went home and started looking it up online. It is a very specialized procedure and not really done by many orthopedists. Our instructions after this visit, were to keep an eye on Sierra's joint; watch for further movement out of socket, and watch for arthritis (a new character in the saga -- and not a very nice one).

So - long story short - four years, two military moves, and four orthopedists later - we are looking at a more imminent procedure. And the clinic visit yesterday was to request a second opinion and if-we-have-to-have-it-done request that Sierra be seen by the hip specialists at Boston Children's Hospital.

So, my daughter and I are on our way home from the clinic where I requested the referral to send us 330 miles away to see these specialists, and we are talking about how friendly her primary care manager is, and my mind is whirling again because this process is a bit daunting - and remember, the radio is playing... It's one of my favorite songs - upbeat and catchy. I look at my daughter and tell her I love this song, and her actions show me that she has shifted from the conversation to the music. First, she starts clapping. Then the clapping widens to include an on-the-beat shoulder swing. Then she gives me an eyebrows-raised, wide-eyed grin of recognition. "It's SHAKE, Mom, look!", accompanied by a shimmy and a hair flip. And finally, the statement that practically makes it impossible for me to drive, I'm laughing so hard...

"It's SHAKE, I wrote it."

Oh God! Help me to look at life through my daughter's eyes. Help me to enjoy each moment. Help me to push away the whirling worry of things I can't control, and help me to put into place, the things I can. Help me to laugh more, dance more, sing more.

Just Some Thoughts

Finally, brothers and sisters, rejoice! 

Strive for full restoration, 

encourage one another, 

be of one mind, 

live in peace. 

And the God of love and peace will be with you.

2 Corinthians 13:11 (NIV)

Our conversation was about centerpieces, place settings, and the menu. My mom always tells me about her plans. This week she's trying a new meat dish, something she saw on Pinterest. Something that had her mouth watering before she'd finished reading the list of ingredients. She wants everything to be perfect for the company she's invited.

That company? They're strangers, really. She knows their names from the directory; she's seen their faces sitting in the pew at the back of the church on Sundays. But she doesn't know about their families. She doesn't know the stories of their growing-up years. She doesn't know their hopes, or their dreams, their fears, their strengths. They will be sitting at her dining room table tomorrow, along with my dad, my sister and her kids, and the new pastor of the church.

Why? Because my mom is doing a Celebration Dinner. She invites church members to her home once a month for good food and conversation, an opportunity to get to know, to enjoy, to fellowship. To honor.

I hardly know how to express what I'm thinking. See, my mom didn't make this up herself. She and my dad were the recipients of a different kind of Celebration Dinner several years ago; a dinner given by a man my dad had rented a room from during his once-upon-a-time-before-his-retirement-contract-work-out-of-state days. This gentleman and my dad became discussion buddies and friends. He opened his home to my family, not only for a Celebration Dinner, but also as an overnight stop while they traveled cross country.

He explained his reasoning to my mom. He explained that he always held a dinner for eight, but he only invited one. That one got to invite the other guests. That one got to choose the menu. Whatever they wanted. If he didn't know how to make it, he learned. He was a 'there you are' kind of guy and made his guest feel welcome and interesting. He honored them. This impressed my mother so much that she brought her version to her hometown. To her home.

Here are some thoughts.

First, I sometimes wonder how many absolutely wonderful, positive expressions of reaching out, of community, of fellowship are happening across America. Without the fanfare of media attention. Without a 'good-job, or pat-on-the-back'. Happening because it's just, plain cool. I think it's happening more than we know. I hope it's happening more than we know.

Second, even if we can't or don't do full-blown Celebration Dinners, can't we do SOMETHING to celebrate each other? To get to know one another better? To share our stories? To encourage?

Send a card
Write a note
Smile more
Call an old friend
Write a personal message on Facebook
Share what you enjoy
Leave an encouraging comment
Jot down a friendly note on a restaurant tip (not instead of the tip...with it - servers work HARD)
Listen better
Ask to help (I added this after reading 3 Magic Words)

Just some thoughts - What do you think? Do you have other ways to reach out to others in celebration? 

Linking with ThreeWordWednesday, and TellHisStory

And now, a confession. I know better than to write a post without an actual scriptural reference, and though I used the reference to 2 Corinthians, it fit the fact that we should encourage one another, but didn't address or reference how. I've been given a gentle nudge in a better direction and want to share the results. 

Honor each other (this sounds like Celebration Dinners..)

1 Corinthians 12:26 (ESV)

"If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together."

Meet together (it's hard to encourage in a vacuum - there are multiple verses that address fellowship)

Hebrews 10:24-25 (NLT)

"Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works.  And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near."

Choose positive language

Ephesians 4:29 (NLT)

"Don't use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them,"

Sing more - share your music with others

Colossians 3:16 (KJV)

"Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord."

Be a friend, buddy, mentor

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 (NLT)

"Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken."

Accept (This one sounds easy, but we so often try to change people to our own expectations...)

Romans 15:7 (NIV)

"Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God."

Forgive, don't gossip, be careful with sarcasm

Ephesians 4:31-32 (KJV)

"Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: and be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you."

There are more. But these are enough for me to consider for awhile. How about you? Do you have a favorite verse that leads to encouragement?